Say it loud! “I’m Pussy Whipped and I’m Proud!!!”

Imagine a parade of attractive, well built, well dressed men marching down the street smiling. They are carrying signs, waving feather dusters and brand new toilet brushes in the air while wearing big ruffled aprons. They are all chanting in unison: “Say it loud! I’m Pussy Whipped and I’m proud!”! Their wives and girlfriends watch proudly and maybe more than a bit smugly as their males proclaim the unbounded joy they feel in serving and obeying them!

OK, back from fantasy land. Sounds kind of fun but, that is not going to happen. What does this phrase really mean, to be “Pussy Whipped”?

Here is the ultimate 'Pussy Whipped" image today:

Humiliating? Yes, but it also kind of turns me on...

Why do these images strike a positive chord with so many of us? Surely they are only for fantasy land. If we lived them out in our real lives they would be humiliating to say the least! Yet there is that strong pull to live under the complete and absolute rule of a good woman! If it were not so, would the internet still be filled with images of female dominance?

There is a real dichotomy between our fantasy lives and our real lives. If we are too stoic and stern demanding respect and obedience from our women it will basically drive almost all of them away and we will be alone. We will find ourselves ‘alone with our principals’! Ha! No thanks. Besides I would never enjoy living that lie of complete patriarchy and I don’t know if anyone who does still practice it enjoys it either, from either side.

But if we are too pliant and too eager to please our females, other males will put us down and make fun of us for the doormats we have become, The women we are courting will often lose interest in us and we will be left alone again. Or will they? I think it depends on how we approach this biggest of issues for us.

Are we looking to be humiliated and punished and controlled? Or are we actually looking to please and serve a woman or women in general?  I think that if you pursue that first option, your needs can only be met by a professional dominatrix, and not a wife. Well not a wife who actually cares about you and wants to stay with you.

But if we approach this issue from what SHE wants and needs, I think that we will find a) that it takes a lot of patience and understanding on our parts and that we generally will have a lot to learn in doing it right! We will also find b) that our needs in serving her needs will be far closer to being met than we could imagine it any other way.

A truly Pussy Whipped man is NEVER left wanting for Female Company...

I think that this saying sums up a lot of my philosophy. “A truly pussy whipped man is never left wanting for female company...” In other words, if you dedicate your life to actually serving and pleasing women, then women who want to be served and pleased will find you and even fight over possession of you! Oh yum! And again I am not talking about begging to be beaten or ill treated here. I mean that you fulfill her actual wants and needs. 

In order to do that I need to go back over some of the other lessons talked about earlier. Few women want a total doormat for a man. They might LOVE having an attentive man who romances her without ceasing and simply does the housework without comment, but they don’t really want a sissy or a slave. 

Happiness is knowing your place!

They want someone who can be strong for them when they need that. And this is an important point. We all need a certain amount of security in our lives and women often look for physical, emotional, and financial ‘protection’ if you will from their man. If you can figure out what her real needs are, fulfill them for her. Then if you can figure out what her wants are, do them for her! Some women want financial and/or physical security. Some women want emotional security. Everyone wants SOMETHING out of their biggest relationship. Find out what she wants and provide it! Or if that need of hers is not something you want to spend your life fulfilling, maybe you should honestly assess your relationship and find someone who needs what you are happy to provide.

Men need to spend the early part of their lives finding out who they are and what they can offer. They also need to find a woman they can connect with and this is a big point, and one that that they can trust! Giving EVERYTHING to another person is a pretty big gift and it’s a bit of a gamble. If you find the right person, then you can both be very happy. If you find the wrong person she may not give a damn about you and just see you as a fool to drain dry and discard. It has happened to more than one eager to please male! In fact it has probably happened to most of us who are reading this at some point.

So don’t rush into the big commitment. Learn about her. Let her learn about you. Practice serving her and giving to her. Give her your time and attention. Help out around her place. Give her little gifts, etc. When the time comes, and you beg her to marry you and take you forever make sure that you are both ready. Then dive in.

For me, the fine line that I walk is that I am 100% masculine in public and I romance my wife. I take care of things. I go to work. I step between her and any possible trouble to always be sure that I am the one closer to harm than she is. I take care of all the little details that I can to insure that she does not have to. But on the other side of the coin, I simply handle the housework and I do it with a smile. I cook. I clean. I do the laundry. I polish her shoes and make certain that everything is in good order without comment. And I always (often jokingly) defer to her authority. When the opportunity comes up I will say something like “Oh I would never question you! You are the Woman in this house!” or “You are the Queen! Your word is law!” I keep it light with a small chuckle but she usually responds with a wry smile that says both “You are so funny pretending to be afraid of little old me.” But also “Hey you are pretty smart for a guy! We women ARE in charge and I’m glad that you acknowledge it!”

So what about this phrase “Pussy Whipped”? First off, I wish there were a gentler and more positive term for this state. I have heard the term ‘uxorious’ in connection with a man who is totally dedicated to serving and pleasing his woman. But even that one is defined as ‘a man who loves his wife too much’. Is that possible? We have no terms for a women who loves her man too much!

I have also heard the phrase “He is a real gentleman.” I kind of like that and I suppose that it does speak more to where we are today. A gentleman certainly puts ladies first and is very chivalrous and in today’s climate I think it DOES show a certain amount of him being enthralled to the marvelous creatures that we know as women.

But if anyone out there has a better term let me know.

The PW term is generally used only by guys to put other guys down. “Oh Ted’s so Pussy Whipped that he won’t go hangout with the guys on the weekend. He’d rather go shopping with that new bitch of his!” I really hate this pejorative use. (And I sure hate that nasty fake macho term for women!)  Both are usually used by guys who have no clue of what makes a woman tick and probably live by themselves under a mountain of empty beer cans and old pizza boxes. No Thanks.

To me this ill defined state of being ‘pussy whipped’ is one of the most wonderful and complete states a man can enter! It is total love and devotion! You are with her and she is happy! Of course there is the other side of the coin if you picked badly or have no idea how to make a woman happy. One of these greedy self centered women may in fact be using you like the fool you are and giving nothing in return. We should expect nothing when we give, but if it is a one way street and she is constantly wounding your heart, then move on. This is not working.

If however you are simply doing for her and she is giving affection and devotion in return, then the ‘pussy whipped’ condition is like heaven on earth! You give and give and she smiles and enjoys! She usually finds ways to express her happiness with you and you just know.

Don't listen to losers. Be who you were meant to be! Serve and Adore your Woman!

Last Valentine’s Day a couple of divorced guys in our department were trying to act tough with the rest of us who are all married. “You want to know what I am going to do tonight? Whatever I want!” then they laughed.  I just smiled and nodded. “OK!” While I knew that I had already bought two dozen red roses to be delivered to her office. Oh how women love to be able to show off like that in front of other women! I was going to go home and give her a gift that I had bought her then dress up and go out to dinner in a nice restaurant. After that I would take the woman whom I have dedicated my life to serving and pleasing out to see a live play. I would end up spending quite a bit of money on her. I would do things most "guys" wouldn't choose to do on their own, and it would make her happy and content that I loved her. Whatever happened after that she would decide and I would accept happily even thankfully and it was EXACTLY what I wanted to do.

So if you have found the woman you will serve and you are both enjoying your relationship then enjoy it. Be proud of it. If some knucklehead wants to make you feel bad that you have found what makes you happy, just laugh it off and keep going. Frankly I wouldn’t want to be alone on Valentine’s Day, and I sure wouldn’t want to give up on a lifestyle that makes my Queen happy for anything!